So now that I got my birth story out there, I can reflect on the last three months. It's hard. It is so fucking hard, I had no idea. People kept telling me when I was pregnant that it would change my life...but I can't help but wonder what they REALLY meant. I met a woman the other day with a 10 month old baby. She told me how he was colicky (and to clarify, for those who don't know, colicky is defined as crying at least 3 hours a day for at least 3 weeks...), and nothing worked to calm him. And then she said he's the best thing that's ever happened to her. I didn't have the nerve to say really?? Why?

Simon is an easy baby, granted he doesn't sleep through the night, but he is not colicky at all and I still wouldn't say this is the best thing that's ever happened to me. Maybe that part comes after 3 months? I think the best advice I've gotten so far has been from my Mom who told me "it gets better". I guess this means I'm not really a "baby" person. I can't wait for him to be older so we can interact more and play. It's getting better, to be sure, but Erik and I both pretty much decided we don't want to do this again.

I feel obligated to note that I love Simon and he is absolutely amazing and wonderful. But sometimes I miss the absolute freedom I enjoyed before. I know we've been incredibly blessed with an easy pregnancy, birth, and a healthy baby. I just didn't expect raising a child to be so challenging and all-consuming. I don't know what I expected.

PS I'm getting really good at typing one handed.

So, I had high hopes of practicing Elimination Communication by the time our two months diaper service gift was over. Well. We're at two months and I haven't even tried once. Why? I guess because parenting is so much harder than I thought it would be! But, the goods news is, I'm learning to relax and things are a lot better than they were (and our baby is one of the easy ones!). That means it's time to try. I read the Diaper Free book (although it was a while ago, I need to refresh), went to a class, joined a local support group, and I even have a little potty for Simon. So what's stopping me? It's so easy to let him go in his diaper and to change it when it's convenient. So why do I even want to try EC? Because I believe it will lead to a shorter dependence on diapers, less issues with the potty, a closer relationship with Simon, and it's what so many families have done in other cultures. I'm going to start today.